Here is a news flash.
Our Seven Oaks 3.0 weekenders women’s tennis team is tied for second place in our league.
It is not my fault.
I am there for comic relief.
When we first started, we had few expectations outside of just having fun.
You practice good sportsmanship when you think you are going to lose all of your matches. Being surprisingly tied for second place tosses good sportsmanship out the window.
Now we are winning and we are out for BLOOD! And maybe a few guts too.
According to our new attitude – ARRGH—we will strategically place our very best players in the match we most need to win to at least clinch second place for a spot in the league playoffs.
I will not be playing in that one. Unless we need a few laughs.
In our match on Sunday, May 6, my partner was Kitty. She’s fun and funny. She’s tall with long legs, and is good up at the net.
I, of course am on the shrimpy side, but I can get a little scramble going in the back court.
After playing a few matches and practicing together as partners, we were thrilled when we actually developed a strategy on the court other than merely getting the #$%* ball over the net.
Here’s our secret formula:
Kitty plays on the deuce (or right) side of the court and I play on the ad (or left) side.
It works – in theory.
On Sunday, we turned losing into a comedy routine.
We were near the end of our second set. Our other teammates had won their matches and had become spectators.
Our opponents hit the ball into the alley on the ad side of the court (that’s my side). The ball was pretty close to the net, and I was in the back court, but I took off after it.
Kitty, who was playing at the net, took off after it too, long legs flying, all the way from the deuce side of the court (that’s the other side).
“I got it!” I shouted.
“I got it!” She shouted.
We crashed into each other at full gallop, tennis rackets clattering, the ball simply bouncing away, completely untouched.
We managed to stay on our feet, thereby allowing me to achieve my main goal in tennis: to not fall down.
Score one for Lucy and Ethel.
(Stay Tuned: A studly story is coming momentarily)