Preventing Wardrobe Malfunctions During Triathlons

bandeau-swimsuit-top.jpgThe question of the day was:

“You aren’t going to wear one of your little beach bikinis are you?”

Was this in reference to:

a)      A day tubing down a local river

b)      A pool party at a local country club

c)      Training for a triathlon

If your answer is “c” you are correct!

I recently became a triathlete, which was scary all in itself.  Throw a beach bikini into the event and the idea escalades into nightmare proportions.

Which leads to cautionary tale number three about wardrobe malfunctions.

Triathlons add a whole new dimension to the issue of clothing malfunctions.  Let me count the ways – ummmm there are three, swimming, biking and running.

However, it did not take accidental nudity (“oh I thought this was a clothing optional triathlon”) to figure that out, just a brief practice swim in my neighborhood pool.

Many of us suffer from tan line phobia. Mine is not so severe that I hit the tanning beds au natural, visit nude resorts, or indulge in full-body tanning sprays.

But I do move straps around a lot and I have invested in bandeau (not bandaid) tops.  These are just swimsuit tops with no straps that swaddle your chest and tie in the back.  Or hook in the back or front.

WARNING:  Do not wear these tops when actually swimming at the swimming pool.  Swimming pool water is clear.  Kids hang out at pools. Adults hang out at pools.  In pools, they sit along the sides of pools on hot days, dangling their legs in.

Kids like to look around underwater for treasure.  Just think of the treasure they could discover if you swim in a bandeau top.

Here is what happens:  As you swim along, the top will work its way down and down from your bust line to your waistline until it becomes a cummerbund. Many people like to have versatile outfits that can be worn in different ways, but not the bandeau swimsuit top.



One thought on “Preventing Wardrobe Malfunctions During Triathlons

  1. I understand that sports bras can work, but then you face the dreaded mono-boob. One woman I know found a sports bra that actually lifts and separates. She enjoyed showing it to everyone in the kickboxing class. I couldn’t thank her enough.

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